Die, horoscope, DIE!

[janestarz]

Let's analyze my horoscope for today, according to Yahoo:

This is a fabulous day for you, dear Taurus, with opportunities abound.
Yes, opportunities to smother myself in more work.

Your warm, sensitive and creative side is feeling loved and nurtured. Radiate this feeling to others. It will come back to you tenfold.
Warm? I feel like a bitch today. I have the urge to kick, scream, and throw stuff. Tenfold eh?

Today is an excellent day for working with others and embarking on any sort of group project.
Embarking on a group project? I was kind of hoping to finish the one we're working on right now. Light, not another one!

Your heart is sparked with feelings of love and romance. Indulge in a cozy dinner for two this evening.
The day I feel love and romance for Marjolein, who will cook for me tonight, a dinner for just the two of us, is the day I commit suicide.