So hello again you all!

Fear my cheerfulness!

After some guitarplay, some talk, cuddling and a good Tigerbalm-rub in, Let NoKey read some of my memories and friends-only posts. Then we linuxed a bit (which was a pretty new experience for me). You get four desktops! Why you'd want four desktops is beyond me, but you get four desktops!

Then we went to bed. Slept after two I think.
The alarm clock was h*a*r*s*h this morning. I woke up, well, let's just say I wasn't in a coma anymore, and crawled into NoKey's arms. Surprisingly, my back didn't hurt from the bed. *thankful smile*
"Runaway Train" played and I begged NoKey to lie until the song was over. After which we got up. He walked me to the train; during the walk my back began to protest. I couldn't relax it and it tensed and cringed. In the end I had trouble breathing which only cleared up a bit when I found a seat in the train (3rd class) and rested my head in my hands.
At Utrecht I switched trains, finding the time to buy a coffee at CafeT (good coffee), coffee Roma...*blissful grin*

I walked to school, grunting a bit, because of my back again. At school, I called the doc and finally got a hold of her assistant. Made an appointment for 11.40 this morning. Finally!

Made the test. American History/Foreign Politics, Religion (including Buddhism and New Age apparantly) and MassCommunication. Grrrrrrreat. 60 questions. Tried to remain concentrated which helped a bit I guess. Tried to focus on my breathing and relax during morning prayer but I was distracted by the teacher saying "saavvvee theeemmm frrrommmm theeeiiirr siinnnnsss" in a very doomy gothy preacherlike tone. Grinned wide. I sinned a bit I guess. Okay, I'm a bigtime sinner (and telling them about it every time I get the chance).

Now I'm trying to download Putty (which is failing miserably) and trying out all flavours of coffee from the new coffeemachine to see which one is actually a bit drinkable. Wiener Melange is the best I had so far.

Then, after seeing the doc, I'll travel to Amsterdam and visit Ladyfest. I won't make it to the Drag King workshop but I had my share last year. Attend the Radical Cheerleading workshop, but not participating because of my back. Hopefully see silverseabear and tommycee again.
Amsterdam. Always a pleasure. Never a chore.

(no subject)

Just saying...I updated my website.

And going to see the doc in a bit.
Need to call mommy, too.

If you can't beat them...

Doc says I need to do some exercises to make my muscles stronger. Stretch'em up a little bit. I'm quite desperate...

In the mornings all's well. Then, after walking and going to school my back slowly starts to ache. When I get back home, limiting my time outside the house (and in and out of bad positions), the pain is almost constant, except when I forcefully relax the muscles.

Around the time I'm done cooking dinner, it feels like there are a hundred ants running in the muscle and sinew and in my spine. By the time I've finished dinner, it's so achy (no matter what chair) I HAVE to lie down. My head on a pillow, on the floor, with my calves on the couch, the spine completely flat. *sigh* That feels great.

I'm kind of feverish though. Throat hurts a bit. And when I was cooking I couldn't imagine myself eating the food I just made (minced meat, potatoes and cauliflower with cheese-sause, sharing with Reini). Hey if you can't beat them, join them. And in this case, when everybody's on their own side, join the strongest one.
And then try to manipulate them. "How much effort can it be, I mean, when you go to bed, you check the doors, put the dishes in the washer, and go upstairs. Takes less then a minute." I'm sure Reini understood. But it takes a lot of time to change a person.

And I just got the offer to stay in this house another year. They must really love me. *grins evilly*

I didn't go to Ladyfest. I fear I just can't. *whimpers* Even though I really want to. I just can't bear the thought of me walking through Amsterdam with a backpack with only the most important stuff (discman, VtM novel, wallet & phone near my body) and getting an ache that will make me whince. Being one hour travelling away from the first comfortable couch or chair. I just...can't.

I also can't work for at least two more weeks. Bye bye income.
Can't larp either. Drat! And it's been so long already. I hope I'll be better bij Octobre. Shiverz...was my best larp until now.